Tag Archives: Ayman al-Zawahiri

10 Names Bin Laden Might Have Considered to Replace Al-Qaida

Al-Qaida is a Gimp

Image by silverfox09 via Flickr

Though he hated America, Bin Laden apparently had nothing against employing a marketing strategy often used in capitalistic economies like the United States.  Rebranding–the strategy of changing a company or organization name to leave bad associations behind and create a new image for a brand–was a serious consideration for Bin Laden, as the Associated Press reported today (http://n.pr/lqggnk).  As Bin Laden saw it, the Al-Qaida brand had lost its luster, and that was hurting the business, if you consider terrorism a business.  Not even a Groupon or LivingSocial deal could boost the brand, he surmised.  His marketing prowess was discovered in the documents recovered from his hideout in Pakistan.  Though it cannot be confirmed (since I made it up), here are…

10 Names Bin Laden Might Have Considered to Replace Al-Qaida

  1. Society for the Advancement of Explosive Devices
  2. Gentlemen’s Club, Minus the Women, Plus Dirty Deeds
  3. Angry Middle Easterners Against Happy People
  4. Cave Dwellers, Minus the Loin Cloths, Plus Robes and Guns
  5. Peaceful Visitors of Hotel Pakistan
  6. Hatfields and McCoys Forever
  7. Osama Running from Obama, Oh Mama
  8. Muslim Hoodlums
  9. Speak Softly and Sport a Big Beard
  10. Evil Doers